佛光论坛

[释普度]

自皈依佛·当愿众生·体解大道·发无上心；
自皈依法·当愿众生·深入经藏·智慧如海；
自皈依僧·当愿众生·统理大众·一切无碍
南无伽蓝圣众菩萨（三称）
南无·喝啰怛那·哆啰夜耶·南无·阿唎耶·婆卢羯帝·烁钵啰耶·菩提萨埵婆耶·摩诃萨埵婆耶·摩诃迦卢尼迦耶·唵·萨皤啰罚曳·数怛那怛写·南无悉吉栗埵·伊蒙阿唎耶
婆卢吉帝·室佛啰愣驮婆·南无·那啰谨墀·醯利摩诃皤哆沙咩·萨婆阿他·豆输朋·阿逝孕·萨婆萨哆·那摩婆萨哆·那摩婆伽·摩罚特豆·怛侄他·唵·阿婆卢醯·卢迦帝
迦罗帝·夷醯唎·摩诃菩提萨埵·萨婆萨婆·摩啰摩啰·摩醯摩醯·唎驮孕·俱卢俱卢·羯蒙·度卢度卢·罚阇耶帝·摩诃罚阇耶帝·陀啰陀啰·地唎尼·室佛啰耶·遮啰遮啰
摩么·罚摩啰·穆帝隶·伊醯伊醯·室那室那·阿啰嘇·佛啰舍利·罚沙罚参·佛啰舍耶·呼嚧呼嚧摩啰·呼嚧呼嚧醯利·娑啰娑啰·悉唎悉唎·苏嚧苏嚧·菩提夜·菩提夜·菩驮夜
菩驮夜·弥帝唎夜·那啰谨墀·地利瑟尼那·波夜摩那·娑婆诃·悉陀夜·娑婆诃·摩诃悉陀夜·娑婆诃·悉陀喻艺·室皤啰耶·娑婆诃·那啰谨墀·娑婆诃·摩啰那啰·娑婆诃
悉啰僧·阿穆佉耶·娑婆诃·娑婆摩诃·阿悉陀夜·娑婆诃·者吉啰·阿悉陀夜·娑婆诃·波陀摩·羯悉陀夜·娑婆诃·那啰谨墀·皤伽啰耶·娑婆诃·摩婆利·胜羯啰夜·娑婆诃
南无喝啰怛那·哆啰夜耶·南无阿唎耶·婆嚧吉帝·烁皤啰夜·娑婆诃·唵·悉殿都·漫多啰·跋陀耶·娑婆诃
伽蓝主者，合寺威灵，钦承佛敕共输诚，拥护法王城，为翰为屏，梵刹永安宁，南无护法藏菩萨摩诃萨，摩诃般若波般蜜。
愿以此功德，庄严佛净土，上报四重恩，下济三途苦，若有见闻者，悉发菩提心，尽此一报身，同生极乐国！

[富士森林]

阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛 阿弥陀佛

[∵万念悬空∴]

阿弥陀佛
弟子谨记

[fghi437]

Acronyms for International Airlines

Italy

ALITALIA = Always Late In The Air, Late In Arrival

ALITALIA = Arrived Late In Turin, And Luggage In Australia

air max
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Britain

BOAC = Better on a camel
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Belgium

SABENA = Such A Bloody Experience Never Again


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pakistan

PIA = Please, Inform Allah


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yugoslavia

JAT = Joke About Time
nike tn

tn

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pacific Western Airlines

PWA = Pray While Aloft

PWA = Please Wait Awhile Airlines


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Trans World Airlines = Teeney Weeny Airlines.

[fghi437]

Nike tn

[fghi437]

A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabbits?"

And the shopkeeper gets down on his knees, so that he?s on her level, and asks: "Do you want a wittle white wabby or a soft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute wittle bwown wabby over there?"
tn The little girl puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice: "I don?t fink my pyfon really giveths a thit."

[fghi437]

A man with a 25 inch long penis goes to his doctor to complain that he is having a problem with this cumbersome instrument and has had more than one complaint. "Doctor," he asked, in total frustration, "is there anything you can do for me?" The doctor replies, "Medically son, there is nothing I can do. But, I do know this witch who may be able to help you." So the doctor gives him directions to the witch.
The man calls upon the witch and relays his story. "Witch, my penis is 25 inches long and I need help. Can anything be done to help me? You are my only hope." The witch stares in amazement, scratches her head, and then replies, "I think I may be able to help you with your problem. Do this. Go deep into the forest. You will find a pond. In this pond, you will find a frog sitting on a log. This frog has magic. You say to frog, will you marry me? When the frog says no, you will find five inches less to your problem."

The man?s face lit up and he dashed off into the forest. He called out to the frog, "Will you marry me?"

The frog looked at him dejectedly and replied, "NO."

The man looked down and suddenly his penis was 5 inches shorter. "WOW," he screamed out loud, "this is great!" But it was still too long at 20 inches, so he decided to ask the frog to marry him again. "Frog, will you marry me?" the guy shouted.

The frog rolled its eyes back in its head and screamed back, "NO!" The man felt another twitch in his penis, looked down, and it was another 5 inches shorter. The man laughed, "This is fantastic." He looked down at his penis again, 15 inches long, and reflected for a moment. Fifteen inches is still a monster, just a little less would be ideal. Grinning, he looked across the pond and yelled out, "Frog will you marry me?"

The frog looked back across the pond shaking its head, "How many times do I have to tell you? NO, NO, NO!"Nike tn